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1. |
Tempest
02:06
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The skies declare war.
The earth shakes and shivers.
The water is up to my neck- I pray for the sea to recede.
I’m desparate.
Will you rebuke the wind?
Will you calm the waves?
Hear my cries- I’m begging, God.
Will you not take heed?
I can’t hold on,
I’m falling.
Pull me out,
I’m drowning.
The cords of death encompass me.
My life’s been claimed by a greedy snare.
In my distress I call out your name-
These violent torrents are too much to bear.
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2. |
Hollow Name
04:29
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I've made an idol out of self-loathing. I detest my abhorrent ways.
I'm wandering a labyrinth I'll never escape.
I've made my bed among the tombs of kings.
I'm led to my death by my idle wanderings.
I'm counting down the days until you turn your back on me.
With this veil over my eyes, I can hardly see.
The knowledge I've gained leaves a bitter taste on my tongue,
and I won't find worth in any of these songs I've sung.
My throat is an open grave as I try to find meaning in my hollow name.
I've come to learn there's a death sentence on me,
but I'll keep drawing out my own misery.
I'll turn my back and thrive in addiction. My pure ambitions will surely fade.
Maybe I'll sink through the cold ground and recede into a state
of nonexistence.
You'll watch me choke on reality; the truth fills up my lungs.
I have a sickness.
I despise myself.
Apathy tries to numb my pain, regret envelops me again. I can't make sense
of this; I can't see your face. Unbounded love surrounds me yet I'm in a pit
of self-condemnation, because I am truly nothing. I could be rescued and
embraced, but my own hatred has me stubbornly chained to the unmoving
ground because I deserve death.
I don't deserve life, I don't deserve redemption. I deserve to be abandoned,
to suffer in my shame.
I don't deserve your grace.
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3. |
Lifelines
03:26
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I'm still weighing my worth against your words.
I'm falling in and out. I can't decide what's worse:
that I'm forgetting your face, a small piece every day,
or that I'm constantly worn thin by these memories.
I'm finding myself more and more at fault in each and every way.
I'm punishing myself the best I can. I'll let the pain become part of me.
Every moment is a lifetime, every memory a lifeline without you here.
As I slipped into your skin, I slid out of mine.
I've been trying to find reason to believe that you'll come home.
It's apparent that this wasn't perfect; maybe we were never meant.
But that doesn't make it easier to justify all the time and emotion spent.
I'm sick of waking up here without you;
I can't get your bitter taste out of my mouth.
You're digging down deep inside me;
I'm scratching at my skin to get you out.
I'll keep digging at this gravesite, night after night,
looking for what you buried here under your waning moon.
Maybe I'll find my body where you left it, and with time I could collect it.
But for now I'll stay here, trying to find a way
back
to
you.
Is this what I deserve? Take back every angry word.
Bled out night after night, with no reprieve in sight.
Tonight, I'll lie awake and shake with rage.
I need escape but I can't break loose.
Can't justify the pain. I'm burning memories of you.
Clocks turning backward. With no sense of bearing, I can't move forward.
I don't feel human anymore.
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4. |
Wanderers
04:03
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It’s like I woke up from a yearlong sleep.
I pull myself from the frozen ground,
darkness everywhere I turn.
I’m trapped, short on air.
I can feel my lungs begin to burn.
I could search for answers or I could break away;
Will I forever wander? I’ve never been so deprived.
I’m forgetting what hope is in the endless night.
Will I ever catch a glimpse of the distant light?
The weight of all my shame has dragged me under.
I will never be rescued from myself.
I’m so deserving of death,
so tell me-
why am I worth saving?
I fall away into this sleep.
I fall away into this slumber.
I feel my lungs collapse,
my body stuck in a paper trap.
I feel the world shift beneath my weight,
a welcome change because I’ve been so empty.
I feel my eyes burn out.
Swallow the sight,
choke
on
the
sound.
I measured out my worth in dark soliloquies.
I was unsteady in my movements, unsure of the ground beneath my feet.
But you took on my pain, your perfect body broken
so I could find new meaning behind every word you’ve spoken.
Will I be set free? I’m on my knees.
My vision has failed me and I can’t breathe.
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5. |
Structures
03:45
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Unflawed equilibrium. Unfathomed complexity,
at the core of our beings,
in this wide expanse of existence.
Lost in this vastness, I can’t find my purpose.
Swallowed in vastness, losing sight of the constant earth below.
Drifting away, I’m desperate for a tether to my soul.
How could I ever forget? You laid the way from my birth to my death.
Disheartened, I’ve wandered this path,
and I’ve grown weary again and again.
But I won’t relent.
My life’s been etched on a divine canvas.
Our vitals rely on the perfect balance that was set into place by perfect hands.
This wide expanse of existence could not be without these intricacies.
Tell me, was this all by chance?
Help me to escape my sheltered self-
I need to see this encompassing beauty.
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6. |
Withered Hands
04:02
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I feel your ghost beside me as I take my aching steps into the sand,
and as the waves take my breath I realize I can no longer stand.
I remember when we sat on the shore.
I watched your guilt pollute the sea.
But I would keep pressing on and turn this vice to apathy.
The waves would come and consume us; you'd no longer see the beauty here, and I would start to drown you the harder I tried to keep you near.
I can't stand with a broken spine. You'll see my hands wither in time.
And even though I know you're gone, your presence lingers on.
I can't keep my languid lids lifted;
I'll sleep on the sand that I've searched and sifted.
But you'll still float through my dreams. You'll swell up and over me.
I keep searching for the root that grew from the seed you planted.
Dark things have grown up, cracked the pavement where we were standing.
There's no place I feel at home.
I've been torn away from everything I've known.
My surroundings are re-arranged;
strange places with familiar names.
And every night I wake up in cold sweat to find a spider in my bed.
I like to think that it's you trying to crawl inside my head.
Lover
this fracture forever
shaped my skin.
I'm
cold and terrified
as morning
comes to watch me break again.
The morning brings such unique sorrow.
I'm sick of watching the sun come up.
No promise of a new day in tomorrow
when I'm tired of waking up.
You
left me
to bear the weight of our sin.
Now I have to bear this burden
until the very end.
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7. |
Fractured Sky
02:23
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(Instrumental)
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8. |
Tides
04:29
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My heart breaks for you.
As you're drowning in a sea of loneliness-
(I watched as your tears flooded the street with sorrow)
You're cut and covered by false concern
hiding apathetic sympathies.
Look and you will find.
Seek and you will be given life again.
Moving on has never been so hard.
You try to rebuild but you fall apart
(and there's no understanding).
Fractured sky above and these tides below.
You watched him drown in the undertow
(and there's no understanding).
Sorrow puts his mask on you; you project a distorted façade
(I watched as strangers prod at your petrified skin).
The earth crumbles, breaks away beneath your feet
(you can't come to terms with what you've lost).
There's a war inside, fueled by feelings you despise.
Standing at the edge of life, this void can't be satisfied.
And I can't find reason to take another step.
Everything has fallen apart, and now I'm asking what's left.
I've been trying to make use of my thoughts-
sorting, collecting, laying them all out. I can't find a pattern here,
but what I have found is that there is pain in others.
We are all broken and bound together.
I wasn't built to bear these burdens alone, and I've spent so much of my life searching for a home.
But I've learned there is a promise in my bones.
We are placed with purpose. Don't believe that you are worthless.
Hope will return; your burdens will be lifted. The sea will be put at ease.
And I've had a death wish, but I'll keep this candle burning.
We've found a way to keep at bay the tides that bring us to our knees.
Suppress hate and embrace his love.
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AUTHORS Indianapolis, Indiana
Our brand new EP "Dead Oak" is available now! Get it here!
AuthorsMusic.com
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